How to Use Something Over Again

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Some memories can be so painful that you just want to forget them. While it is non possible to erase memories from your mind, there are strategies that you tin can use to brand a memory less prominent. You can also practice things to change the way a memory makes you feel and to replace unpleasant memories with new pleasant ones. Keep in listen that it is non always possible to forget a retentivity, so you may want to consider talking to a therapist if unpleasant memories are interfering with your life.

1. 1

   Figure out what you would like to forget. Before you tin can forget a memory, y'all will need remember about the details of that memory. Doing so might be hard, but it is necessary. Write out your answers to the following questions to figure out the details of the memory:

   • What happened?
   • Who was involved?
   • Where and when did it happen?
   • What else was going on?
   • How did you feel?

2. 2

   Think about what bothers you the virtually about the retentivity. Your next footstep is to pinpoint the almost upsetting parts of the memory. Getting to the root of what bothers you the most will help you figure out what yous need to forget. Write these specific things downward so that you tin can work on forgetting them.

   • Keep in mind that you can't forget the existence of your ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend, simply you can forget particular dates, events, or sense memories. For instance, y'all might be able to forget the smell of a perfume, your offset date, or something that your ex said to you.
   • If yous notice yourself dwelling house on traumatic experiences, list the people who harassed you lot, the specific locations that caused you grief, and other sensory details like the scent of the lunchroom, the locker room, or the gym.

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3. 3

   Erase the retention with a ritual release. You tin use the details that yous have identified to perform a ritual release. A ritual release is a mental practice that may help you to forget a memory.^[1] To do a ritual release, all you have to practice is turn your memory into a mental snapshot and imagine that you lot are setting information technology on burn.

   • In your heed, movie a part of the memory that y'all want to forget. Endeavor to imagine this item like a moving-picture show. Then, imagine that you are setting that picture on burn down.^[2] Imagine the edges of the photo turning brown and curling up, then turning blackness and crumbling away. Imagine the burn burning your mental memory picture until the picture is gone.
   • You could besides effort using another image in place of the actual retentiveness. For example, you could imagine your nifty equally a Honda Civic sinking into a swimming or equally a freight train slowly crashing into a wall.
   • This may not piece of work for some people, as old memories never truly leave the brain.

4. four

   Remove your "trigger objects." Certain objects or images may trigger a painful memory for you and arrive harder to forget the memory.^[3] If yous accept any objects or pictures that trigger bad memories for you, then put them somewhere out of sight or consider getting rid of them.

   • For example, yous may want to get rid of anything that reminds yous of your ex, including photographs and gifts your ex gave you lot.
   • Do a scan of all of your senses when you're trying to figure out what's triggering a memory. Anything can trigger memory—it might be the light at a sure time a solar day, a phrase someone else used to say, or a certain odour, for instance.^[4]

5. 5

   Consider hypnosis. You might also find that hypnosis can help you lot to forget unwanted memories. Hypnosis requires you to enter a relaxed state so that you volition be more than open to suggestions.^[5] Wait for a professional person hypnotist in your area if this is something that you would similar to try.

   • Keep in mind that non everyone can be hypnotized, and then it might not work for y'all. For those who can be hypnotized, at that place is also the chance that the furnishings volition only final a brusque time.^[6]

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1. ane

   Endeavor thinking about unpleasant details while doing pleasant things. One manner to overcome the bad feelings associated with a retention is to teach yourself to associate the unpleasant retention with good things.^[7] Your goal is to make these painful memories less painful through positive association.

   • Do something that makes yous happy while thinking about a bad memory. For case, you could reflect on the embarrassment y'all felt when you broke upward with your partner while listening to soothing music. Or, take a comfy bath with scented candles while thinking about a time that you lost your job.
   • If positive association does not seem help, so y'all can try too listening to loud white noise to drown out painful memories. Consider surrounding yourself with radios all turned to static, or other white racket generators while meditating on the painful memories.

2. ii

   Make some new memories. Another bully way that yous tin can get rid of onetime memories is to become out and form some new ones. Even if you're not doing things related to the memory you'd similar to forget, forming new memories will push button the things yous want to forget out of the style.^[8] Some things you lot can do to start forming new memories include:

   • take upwardly a new hobby
   • read a new book
   • sentry a movie
   • detect a new chore
   • make some new friends

3. 3

   Notice ways to meliorate on bad memories. Yous may be able to replace a retentivity that yous want to forget by edifice new memories that are similar to the sometime ane.^[ix] Endeavour to seek out ways to experience positive things that are like to the memory that you lot want to forget. Subsequently a while, your heed will start crossing its pathways and the original retention won't exist as potent.

   • For instance, if you want to forget a trip you took to San Francisco, consider making another trip to San Francisco or have a trip to somewhere nearly there. Visit Berkley, Oakland, or Palo Alto. During your trip, buy new t-shirts, take new beach photos, and check out new restaurants.
   • If your ex'south cologne is stuck in your mind, caput to the fragrance counter. Scent every single kind of men'south cologne you can, clogging your mind with new scents and dissimilar kinds of fragrance.
   • Go on dates. If you are bothered by memories of an ex, maybe going on a date will help you to movement on and brand some new skillful memories.

4. 4

   Consider talking to a therapist. If yous are unable to forget or overcome negative feelings because of a bad retentiveness, then it might be a good idea to seek the help of a therapist. A therapist can help yous to deal with your emotions regarding a retentivity then that you can movement on with your life.

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• Question

  Why do I go along recalling bad memories?

  

  Dr. Allison Broennimann is a licensed Clinical Psychologist with a private practice based in the San Francisco Bay Surface area providing psychotherapy and neuropsychology services. With over a decade of feel, Dr. Broennimann specializes in in-depth psychotherapy to provide solution-focused treatments for anxiety, depression, relationship problems, grief, adjustment bug, traumatic stress, and phase-of-life transitions. And equally part of her neuropsychology do, she integrates depth psychotherapy and cognitive rehabilitation for those recovering subsequently traumatic brain injury. Dr. Broennimann holds a BA in Psychology from the University of California, Santa Cruz, and an MS and Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Palo Alto Academy. She is licensed past the California Lath of Psychology and is a member of the American Psychological Association.

  

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  Every unmarried moment of our lives is stored in long-term memory in our bodies. If yous're not sure what's bringing them up, endeavor doing a scan of your senses and listen to what your torso is telling you. Is the light reminding you of something? Is information technology a smell or a flavor? Sometimes it might even be the time of day or certain shade from the clouds.

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• Listening to an sound book and concentrating on the story can help. Try something lighthearted yet interesting to distract yourself.

• Exist patient. Each method will take time and lots of repetition for success. Don't be deterred by failure but keep going. Inquire for aid if needed.

• Forgetting things can exist challenging. Sometimes, it'southward ameliorate to recall of something else instead. This way, you can divert your heed from thinking nigh the memory. Try doing this every time the memory pops upwards in your mind.

• Endeavour getting a vocal out of your head by simply looking upwards the lyrics. Unclear or forgotten lyrics are often the reason for a stuck song.

• If a retentivity comes up that you'd rather not remember, remind yourself that it'south something that happened in the past—it isn't actually happening now.^[x]

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Article Summary Ten

To purposefully forget things, kickoff by making a list of the memories you desire to forget and what bothers you near them. Next, identify objects or images that trigger your bad memories, such as photos of your ex or a detail scent, and remove these things from your environs. You can also try a mental exercise similar a ritual release to help you let get of your memories, or you can seek professional aid from a therapist to guide and support y'all through the process. For tips on replacing your bad memories with good ones, read on!

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